A WOMAN has revealed that she was miserable with her husband and their practically non-existent sex life, but has now found herself cheating on him with a woman.
Now she is having most amazing sex she’s ever had with her lesbian lover, but feels lost, helpless and ashamed of her actions.
A woman has confessed that she is cheating on her husband with a woman *stock image*[/caption]
Whilst she admitted to having the most amazing sex she’s ever had, she acknowledged feeling ashamed and lost too[/caption]
Eager to receive advice on what to do next, the anonymous woman took to social media to share her situation, leaving many open-mouthed.
Posting on Reddit, on the r/offmychest thread, the woman wrote under the username @ImakeBADchoices72 and titled her post ‘I’ve cheated on my husband with another woman’.
She then shared some context to the situation and explained: “My marriage has been in trouble for the past year, but instead of trying to really face it, and try to fix things, I just tried to sweep things under the rug.
“I’m a people-pleaser, and often do things just to make people happy, even if I’m miserable. I’ve done the same when it comes to our sex life.
“We hardly have sex anymore, I just don’t want to. I’m tired of putting on an act like I even want to have sex.
“The only reason I have, in the past, is that I know how important it is to my husband, and I don’t want him to think it’s something he’s done wrong.
“It’s my problem, a problem I’ve had for a long time. My inability to experience pleasure isn’t his fault, and I’ve never let on that it is a real problem.”
The woman claimed that her husband’s business is now “all he talks about” and has required a lot of her time, which she has become resentful for.
She continued: “I’ve tried to set boundaries, about what I will do, and won’t do, but I’ve consistently ignored the boundaries, and given in to what he needs from me, just so I don’t rock the boat.
“I’m so tired of my needs being ignored, but I also realise that it’s all my fault for not standing up for what I need, and sticking to my guns about things.
“The business has taken over our lives, our bank accounts, and our marriage. I am so proud of what my husband has accomplished, but I don’t want to be involved anymore.
“He feels that if we can’t work together, that we probably can’t make a relationship work. I begged him to go to therapy with me, but he flatly refused.
“I’ve felt so helpless and alone, and I feel like he hasn’t taken my concerns to heart. That’s no excuse for what I did, but it just explains where my head has been at.”
But then after going to a friend’s house to work on an art project, things quickly took a turn.
Four red flags your partner is cheating
Private Investigator Aaron Bond from BondRees revealed four warning signs your partner might be cheating.
They start to take their phone everywhere with them
In close relationships, it’s normal to know each other’s passwords and use each other’s phones, if their phone habits change then they may be hiding something.
Aaron says: “If your partner starts changing their passwords, starts taking their phone everywhere with them, even around the house or they become defensive when you ask to use their phone it could be a sign of them not being faithful.”
“You should also look at how they place their phone down when not in use. If they face the phone with the screen facing down, then they could be hiding something.”
They start telling you less about their day
When partners cheat they can start to avoid you, this could be down to them feeling guilty or because it makes it easier for them to lie to you.
“If you feel like your partner has suddenly begun to avoid you and they don’t want to do things with you any more or they stop telling you about their day then this is another red flag.”
“Partners often avoid their spouses or tell them less about their day because cheating can be tough, remembering all of your lies is impossible and it’s an easy way to get caught out,” says Aaron.
Their libido changes
Your partner’s libido can change for a range of reasons so it may not be a sure sign of cheating but it can be a red flag according to Aaron.
Aaron says: “Cheaters often have less sex at home because they are cheating, but on occasions, they may also have more sex at home, this is because they feel guilty and use this increase in sex to hide their cheating. You may also find that your partner will start to introduce new things into your sex life that weren’t there before.”
They become negative towards you
Cheaters know that cheating is wrong and to them, it will feel good, this can cause tension and anxiety within themselves which they will need to justify.
“To get rid of the tension they feel inside they will try to convince themselves that you are the problem and they will become critical of you out of nowhere. Maybe you haven’t walked the dog that day, put the dishes away or read a book to your children before bedtime. A small problem like this can now feel like a big deal and if you experience this your partner could be cheating,” warns Aaron.
She admitted: “One of her friends walked in the door, and immediately I felt like I knew this woman, and that I wanted to know this woman, all at the same time.
“Fast forward a few weeks, and we were at another function together, and we made plans to go out to an art festival with another woman. It was lovely, and she was very complimentary towards me, but it was all very platonic.
“The next day, I felt compelled to call her and ask her to dinner after she got back from a trip she was taking. I figured that we could get together when she got back, several weeks from that point, but she instead suggested meeting up that next night.
“The evening was great, and as the drinks flowed, the conversation veered off into talking about how a lot of her exes were “straight girls” and I mentioned that I wasn’t exactly straight.
I felt like I finally understood why so many people I’ve known have let sex rule their decisions, and I felt like I understood what the big deal was
Reddit poster
“We went to leave the bar. She touched my shoulder and asked if I was comfortable driving home, and did I feel safe. When she touched me, there were bells and whistles, and it was like an electric current shot through my body.”
And after going back to the woman’s house, the infidelity truly began, as she admitted: “We went back to her place and had a drink and chatted, no funny business. When I went to leave, it was awkward, and we went in for a hug, but then it turned into a kiss. I knew I had to leave or it would go further.
“I saw her a few other times, with other people, and there was a definite electricity in the air, and I was on a path that I felt like I wanted to be on, even though I knew that I was on the road to betraying my husband.
“We ended up getting together and had the most amazing sex I’ve ever had.
The best sex positions
The most searched sex positions…
- The five best sex positions for larger women
- What is the eagle sex position?
- What is the hook sex position and does it make men bigger?
- The speed bump sex position promises intense orgasms
- The snow angel sex position is the best one for winter months to heat things up
- The pumpkin spice is the best sex position to spook up your Halloween
- The pretzel-dip sex position will leave you and your partner satisfied
- These are the sex positions that will burn the most calories
- What are the best sex positions for beginners?
Follow our sex positions page for more
“I felt like I finally understood why so many people I’ve known have let sex rule their decisions, and I felt like I understood what the big deal was.
“If it were just sex, I could end it, and just be happy for that glimpse of pleasure that I had, and move on so as not to hurt my husband, but it’s an emotional affair at this point.
“I feel like I can be more honest with her, and that she actually listens to me. But I also know that it’s not a fair comparison, because everyone is attentive in the beginning of relationships.
“It’s the honeymoon period. I was once in love with my husband, and he was also attentive and romantic once, so I realise that I’m not being fair.”
I’m lost and helpless, and I’m so ashamed of what I’ve done, but at the same time, I’ve never felt this passionate about another person, ever
Reddit poster
Unsure on how to move forward, the Reddit poster acknowledged: “I’m torn because my husband deserves better than me, he deserves someone that will be faithful and desire him. I love him, even though I’ve betrayed him, and I love the new woman in my life as well.
“I’m lost and helpless, and I’m so ashamed of what I’ve done, but at the same time, I’ve never felt this passionate about another person, ever.
“I’ve always been known as a goody two shoes, who was always a rule follower, and I just wonder what has happened to me.
“I hate what I’ve done to my husband, and have no idea where to go from here.”
Reddit users react
Reddit users were left gobsmacked by the woman’s confession and many quickly flocked to the comments to share their thoughts and advice.
Either stay and deal, or leave
Reddit poster
One person simply said: “You should be honest with your husband.”
Another added: “You should just tell him, I bet he’ll be more intrigued than mad.”
But at the same time, someone else advised: “Never tell your husband. He doesn’t want to know you cheated. That would just be cruel. Either stay and deal, or leave.”
To this, the Reddit author responded: “Yes, that’s what my therapist said as well. I don’t want to be more cruel than I already have been. Thanks for your advice.”
