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DEAR DEIDRE: I WANT to tell my girlfriend I wear women’s underwear but I am not sure what her reaction would be.

I am a 29-year-old man, my girlfriend is 27 and we have been together for just over a year and get on brilliantly. We have been talking about moving in together.

But what she doesn’t know is that I secretly wear knickers. I have been wearing them for years, but I have kept it private.

On the days I know I am not seeing her I will almost always wear a lacy thong under my guy clothes.

I even wore a pink bra and thong to work the other day under my suit.

I so want to tell her before we move in but I worry I will lose her because she will be horrified and dump me on the spot. I’ve only ever told one girlfriend, and she couldn’t handle it.

I’m scared this will happen again, but I’m sick of living a lie.

I keep wondering whether it would be easier to let her “catch” me in the act.

Could I just keep doing this in secret, or should I try to stop this?

Can some women accept a man who likes to wear women’s underwear?

DEIDRE SAYS: It is up to you what underwear you want to wear and many men enjoy cross-dressing.

Some women are accepting of a man’s need to do this. Talking to your girlfriend about it is the only way that you can find out if she could accept your kink.

If she cannot accept it, do not be tempted to say you will stop. This is a part of your personality.

It would help if you could talk to an expert first, someone who understands the issues involved and can reassure you.

My support pack Worried About Cross-Dressing? will help you explain to her.

PHIL FODEN has finally got his spark back and is now aiming to light up the rest of Manchester City’s season.

The Premier League’s Player of the Year in 2023-24 felt burnt out when he returned to the club following last summer’s European Championship.

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Phil Foden opened up on his Euro 2024 heartache[/caption]

Although England reached the final in Germany, it was a difficult tournament for Foden.

The hangover from that disappointment lasted several months and it is only since the start of 2025 we have begun to see the old Foden again.

It cannot be a coincidence that six goals in the last four Prem games have coincided with a mini-revival for Pep Guardiola’s team.

And they need their homegrown star to continue to shine to help save their Champions League skins tonight.

Only a win over Club Brugge will be enough for the 2022-23 winners to avoid an embarrassing early exit.

Yet with Foden back in form, most expect them to get the job done.

The hopes of a fifth straight Prem title may be all but gone but the midfielder insists City have plenty to play for — and he intends to be at the centre of it.

Foden, 24, said: “Even though it’s been a challenging season, we’ve still got things to look forward to.

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“Because we’re having a bit of a blip, we can’t lose belief in that.

“I still believe we can do good things and come back from this. I want to try to show I’m a leader by turning up in big moments and help the team when I can.

“We need to look at finishing at least top four in the Premier League — aiming to win the Champions League and the FA Cup as well.”

Foden has been pivotal to City’s recent success which has seen them win six of the last seven Prem titles.

It is only 19 months ago they did the Treble but Foden feels all the exertions of recent years finally caught up with him in August.

He could not find the energy which has been such a key feature of his game — leaving fans wondering what was wrong.

Foden said: “For me, football is played with the brain and when the brain is mentally fatigued you’re not going to see a player for who he is.

“I’m normally itching to get back but when I came back my body and my mental state was low.

“I’ve been playing since the age of five pushing myself every day to be the best I can.

“When you add up all the games and all the travelling it is a lot for the body.

“I wasn’t feeling 100 per cent when I was training, and there were a few niggles. There were times when I was getting frustrated.

“My body didn’t feel how I was used to and it’s something I’ve had to deal with.

“I feel that’s the reason why I had a slow start to the season. I had a bit of rest, just to give my body time to recover.

“I took the start of the season very slowly, I didn’t play much. I was resting and trying to get back to myself.

“When you start the season good, I feel you have the rest of the season good.

I feel frustrated I didn’t get out what I wanted to. The position I was put in on the left was very difficult to influence the game.

Phil Foden

“But I missed periods at the start of the season so I think that’s why it’s taken me so long to get going.”

Foden is looking much more like his old self now — as City have started to go through the gears since Christmas.

But the regrets over his time at the Euros with the Three Lions — when so much was expected of him — still linger.

The England faithful even came up with a song — an adaptation of Bruce Springsteen’s Dancing in Dark.

But Foden was stuck out on the left by former boss Gareth Southgate and never really got going — even though he played every game as the Three Lions reached the final.

He said: “I feel frustrated I didn’t get out what I wanted to. The position I was put in on the left was very difficult to influence the game.

“Coming off last season — being the best player in the Premier League and playing centre midfield — I do feel the position was quite difficult to get used to.

“I’m one who can play multiple positions and I had to try to deal with it the best I could.

“I don’t feel like England ever got going or performed to our potential.”

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Gareth Southgate played Foden on the left[/caption]

MIKEL ARTETA blasted the attack of referee Michael Oliver and urged governing bodies to kick “hatred” out of football.

Police are investigating abuse suffered by Oliver after he controversially sent off defender Myles Lewis-Skelly in Arsenal’s 1-0 victory over Wolves last weekend.

EPA

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Michael Oliver is currently having his house monitored by police after ‘abhorrent abuse’ following the match[/caption]

PA

Oliver controversially sent off Arsenal youngster Myles Lewis-Skelly during the match[/caption]

The Gunners full-back has since had his three-match ban wiped out by an independent committee after the club filed an appeal on Tuesday morning – despite the player missing the news due to being ASLEEP on the plane.

But ref Oliver continues to have his house watched by police following alleged threats against him and his two-year-old daughter – leaving the PGMOL “appalled”.

And Arsenal boss Arteta – who recently slated the online hate aimed at his player Kai Havertz – said: “Regardless of whether it is a player or a coach, a referee — it does not matter.

“We shouldn’t be here with this hatred, these things we see, because they affect everyone and in the end, they take away the joy of this sport.

“We have to really work harder to try to eradicate that part of the game that brings nothing but bad stuff, bad taste and it makes people’s lives more difficult. Let’s get it out, let’s kick it out.

“For everyone in football. You should not be permitted [to do that]. We don’t want it, we don’t need it and it certainly damages our sport.

“We are talking about it, but no one seems to be moving strongly enough because it’s just unacceptable. Why haven’t we done it?

“We’re always putting a lot of emphasis on where football is going in the next five, ten years; on the rules, and all that sort of thing.

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Lewis-Skelly was dismissed for a trip on Wolves star Matt Doherty[/caption]

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“But the most important thing we can do is create an environment that’s much better at a social level: one that’s healthier, that’s nicer.

“Reward things that are not only winning, that when people make mistakes they have the chance to make amends.”

Oliver will not officiate Arsenal’s clash with Manchester City on Sunday, instead taking charge of Ipswich vs Southampton at Portman Road on Saturday before overseeing the Merseyside Derby between Liverpool and Everton on February 5.

It is also alleged that Oliver received a threat of a car bomb after the awarding of a penalty during Manchester United’s 2-2 draw with Liverpool on January 5.

Havertz also had his wife and unborn child attacked on Instagram following Arsenal’s FA Cup third round penalty shoot-out defeat to Man United on January 12 in which the German missed the decisive spot-kick.

Arsenal were understood to have been in touch with the PGMOL over the abuse aimed at Oliver and are supportive of any inquiries.

The PGMOL said in a statement on Sunday: “No official should be subject to any form of abuse, let alone the abhorrent attacks aimed at Michael and his family.

“We are supporting Michael, and all those affected, and are determined to tackle this unacceptable behaviour. Sadly, this is not the first time a match official has been forced to deal with threats in recent times.”

Lewis-Skelly was sent off in the 43rd minute at Molineux for a tame trip on Matt Doherty inside the Wolves half – with the decision upheld by VAR official Darren England as “serious foul play”, one that left Arteta “fuming”.

Oliver also sent off Wolves’ Joao Gomes in the 70th minute for a second yellow before Riccardo Calafiori scored a late winner.

Pundits such as Micah Richards and Alan Shearer blasted Oliver for sending off Lewis-Skelly, the former labelling it “one of the worst decisions I have ever seen”.

On Lewis-Skelly’s ban being lifted, Arsenal defender Riccardo Calafiori said: “We knew that it was a mistake, and now we keep on going and I’m happy for him.

“He’s a strong guy mentally and also on the pitch.”

An Arsenal statement said yesterday evening: “An independent Regulatory Commission has upheld a claim of wrongful dismissal in relation to Myles Lewis-Skelly and removed his three-match suspension.”

Asked how Lewis-Skelly reacted to the news ahead of their Champions League clash at Girona, Arteta said: “He was sleeping on the plane [to Spain] when I got the news and looked back.

“I haven’t spoken to him but I imagine there is a big smile on his face.

On if he woke him up, Arteta laughed: “I was working and he was in the back, so I didn’t.”

AP

Kai Havertz and his family were recently the victims of online abuse too[/caption]

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